Presents, Snow, and Mistletoe
by Madori-Chan
Summary: Charles Dickens' 'A Christmas Carol'... Yami no Matsuei style!


Yeah! I finally got this up! I meant to put it up around Christmas, but as you can see, I was a little late ^_^;  
  
Warning! VERY not to script... in fact, one could say there is no script at all... but it follows the main idea.  
  
Cast -  
  
Tsuzuki - Cratchet  
  
Tatsumi - Scrooge  
  
Watari - Marley (and, well, himself)  
  
Hisoka - Ghost of Christmas Past (and himself)  
  
Ruka - Ghost of Christmas Present  
  
Muraki - Ghost of Christmas yet to come  
  
Disclaimer - How could I own Yami no Matsuei? Just leave me alooooone!!!  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
As the camera zooms in to the building, we hear Christmas music and a familiar voice. As it zooms closer, we see a purple-eyed shinigami hanging up wreaths and singing along to Christmas music.  
  
"Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la, la la la la." He looked up as he was hanging the last wreath and happened to glance at a calendar. "What? Only eight more days until Christmas, and I haven't done my shopping yet! Tatsumi could use a break, and I doubt Hisoka has ever gotten a Christmas present in his life."  
  
He finished hanging wreaths and ran over to the chief's office.  
  
"Ano... uh, Konoe? I know I haven't finished paying for the library yet, but can I borrow some money? It's for Christmas shopping." He added hastily, seeing Kachau raise an eyebrow. Konoe, being in a giving mood, loaned Tsuzuki some money and he ran off to do his shopping.  
  
** **  
  
Meanwhile, Watari, Tatsumi, and Hisoka were in the employee's office. Watari was scribbling something on a piece of paper, no doubt trying to perfect a formula. Tatsumi was hard at the paperwork, as usual, and Hisoka was hiding from Saya and Yuma, who had decided that they couldn't wait until Christmas day to show off the new dress they had bought for him.  
  
"I wonder where Tsuzuki is." Tatsumi looked around. "Usually he would be here trying to get Watari-san to play checkers or something."  
  
"It's probably nothing important. He probably went out to get something to eat." Hisoka put down the book that he was reading.  
  
** **  
  
Little did the trio know, Tsuzuki wasn't at a restaurant (gasp!); he was doing his shopping.  
  
"Let's see. I got Hisoka's present, Tatsumi's present, Konoe's, Terazuma can live without a present, Wakaba's is in the cart." Tsuzuki was checking off a list with a pen. "Now all that's left is to get Watari's present. That won't be too easy to find." He walked off down an isle, on his way asking where he could get six pounds of chemicals.  
  
After a couple of hours and a full bag, Tsuzuki was ready to go back to Meifu. But first...  
  
Tsuzuki looked up as his stomach growled. "Maybe I should get something to eat first."  
  
He walked around until he had found the café he had been looking for. This place had always had the best pie. He was halfway in the door when who should appear, but Muraki, with eight tiny reindeer! Nah, just kidding, he only had mistletoe.  
  
"Hello, Asato, look what I've found!" He gestured to the mistletoe in his hand.  
  
"What do you want, Muraki?" Tsuzuki said, glaring.  
  
"Only to have a bit of alone time with the person I care about."  
  
"That's not going to happen." He caught a glimpse of the clock and realized that the others would be worrying about him soon. "Why don't you make things easy and just go away?"  
  
"But I can't do that, after the trouble I went through to get this. Do you know how hard it is to find a good piece of mistletoe?"  
  
"AAAH!"  
  
The next thing anyone knows, Tsuzuki is getting chased around town by a mistletoe-wielding Muraki. ^_^;;  
  
** **  
  
"Don't you think Tsuzuki should have come back by now? It's not like him to miss one of Wakaba's feasts."  
  
Tatsumi looked up. "Kurosaki-kun, do you know how long it takes for Tsuzuki to pick out a single cake? If he went out to eat, this is normal for him. If he went out for some other reason, though, it is rather strange."  
  
At that moment, the door flung open and a bedraggled, but still happy, Tsuzuki bounced in. (gee, good timing, huh?)  
  
Watari blinked. "What happened to you?"  
  
"Hm? Oh, I did some shopping and then ran into Muraki. I escaped, though!"  
  
"Shopping for what?" Tatsumi scowled. He hated people wasting money.  
  
A big smile lit Tsuzuki's face as he pulled on a Santa Clause hat. "Christmas cookies! Here!" He started to distribute. Hisoka and Watari took them, just thankful that Tsuzuki hadn't baked them himself. When he handed one to Tatsumi, however, the accountant got angry and stood up.  
  
"Tsuzuki-san, how many times have I told you not to spend department money on food? How much did you spend? Your pay is getting docked for this!" he turned and stomped out of the room.  
  
"Wow, what's his problem?" Hisoka asked, sweatdropping.  
  
Watari shook his head and shrugged. "I don't know. I haven't seen him this angry since Tsuzuki had to stay in the hospital wing for a month and couldn't pay off the damages. I wouldn't worry about it too much. Tatsumi will be Tatsumi." He looked around and spotted something. "Tsuzuki, is that mistletoe in your hair? Have you been seeing somebody?"  
  
Tsuzuki's face paled us the memories came back, and he ran out of the room, screaming.  
  
** **  
  
The next morning, Tsuzuki had forgotten about last night's occurrences and started stuffing his face again. Tatsumi however... had not.  
  
"Tsuzuki! Stop eating and get to work!"  
  
Tsuzuki looked up at him with puppy dog eyes. "But it's only 6 days until Christmas, and I don't have any work!"  
  
"Bah, humbug!" He turned around and walked to his desk. Though mad Tatsumi was, he could not resist the power of he master of pity. Unfortunately for Tsuzuki, that didn't stop him from coming back five minutes later with a pile of paperwork for him.  
  
"Sniffle, Tatsumi is being mean to me. why is he in such a grouchy mood?" A while later, Tsuzuki had finished his paperwork and was headed for home. "I know! I should throw a party! Everyone likes parties! I'll cook up lots of yummy food for everyone, too! This should cheer everyone up!" He ran home as quickly as he could, exited to make the invitations.  
  
** **  
  
Tatsumi had arrived at his house much later than Tsuzuki because he had done some more paperwork.  
  
"Why is everyone so happy about Christmas? There is no point to the holiday and as far as I can see, it's just a big waste of money buying people things that they could easily live without."  
  
He walked into the kitchen to have some dinner before going to bed. It was there that he saw a small envelope on the counter.  
  
"That's odd. I locked the door before I left, maybe one of the GuShoShin delivered it." He picked up the small square envelope and opened it. It seemed to be an invitation of some sort. It read:  
  
Come To Tsuzuki's Christmas party!  
  
Presents, goodies, food, and lots of fun!  
  
When: Christmas!  
  
Where: Tsuzuki's house.  
  
~Tsuzuki  
  
Tatsumi put down the letter and harrumphed "Wasting money again. I'll deduct this from his paycheck, too. He never learns, does he?" He swept the invitation off of the counter with his had, into the garbage, and went to bed.  
  
** **  
  
It was now two days until Christmas, and Tatsumi had become more and more stingy. In the past four days, he had cut Watari's pay, yelled at Tsuzuki two more times, and had almost killed Saya and Yuma for making excess noise. Everybody had almost had all they could take.  
  
"We should do something." Tsuzuki, Watari, and Hisoka were once again in the employee's room.  
  
Watari sighed. "It's never gotten this bad before."  
  
"He stopped buying food, too." Tsuzuki was on the ground, longingly staring at cooking magazines. "And he cut my pay check so much that I can't buy my own."  
  
** Christmas Eve **  
  
It was now Christmas Eve, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a- (ah dangit, I'm in a rhyming mood again!) Well, uh, not even a certain blue-eyed accountant.  
  
He had been having a fitful night. He kept waking up in a cold sweat constantly until finally he managed to get into a dreamless sleep.  
  
Then, the clock struck midnight. Tatsumi woke at the sound and, not seeing anything, tried to go back to sleep. That, however, proved impossible. He woke again to find a ghostly figure, who looked suspiciously like Watari (hey, I had to think of something), standing at the foot of his bed.  
  
Tatsumi's face paled. "Watari-san?"  
  
"I am not Watari! I am just a person -well, ghost- who looks suspiciously like him!"  
  
"Right." Tatsumi rolled his eyes. "What do you want?"  
  
"You have been a very bad person, Tatsumi! To make up for your actions, you will be visited by three ghosts!  
  
"Bah, humbug! Go away!"  
  
"Alright, but I warned you!" The spirit faded away and left Tatsumi alone once again.  
  
"Humph, Ghosts." He turned over and went back to sleep.  
  
Then, the clock struck midnight. again! (Am I a creative person or what?) Unfortunately, Tatsumi was asleep and didn't hear it. He woke partially by the sound of something above him being moved.  
  
"Stupid fan, I'll have to fix that one of these days." He muttered.  
  
"What are you talking about?" a voice floated into his head.  
  
"Hmm, maybe I should take a short break, I'm starting to hear things." Then he remembered what the ghost that looked suspiciously like Watari had said about 3 spirits. He opened his eyes to see what, apparently, was the first of those spirits.  
  
Tatsumi's face paled again. "Kurosaki?"  
  
The ghost crossed his arms. "Shut up, I'm not Kurosaki!"  
  
(Actually, he is. According to many versions of the play, the Spirit of Christmas Past appears in the form of a child, and, well, he was the youngest one I could find ^_^;)  
  
"Only someone who looks suspiciously like him?" Tatsumi muttered under his breath.  
  
"Well, following the script, I'm supposed to take you to the past and show you how happy you were."  
  
Tatsumi just had to interfere here. "Hold on. Are you sure you've got the right person, Kurosaki-kun?"  
  
"Yes, I am! And stop referring to me as Kurosaki! Now, I need batteries for the transport."  
  
"Huh? Batteries?" Tatsumi blinked.  
  
The spirit fumbled around in his pocket and brought out a small black box, to which was attached a red button reading 'push to travel to past.'  
  
The rest of the crew: *Facefault*  
  
(Come on, readers, you can't tell me you didn't see that coming!)  
  
"Hmm, it's dead. Got any Duracell?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Forget it. Stupid contraption never worked anyway." He tossed it over his shoulder and, by the sound, through a window. He turned to Tatsumi. "Here, come outside. You see that kid there? The one frolicking in the snow and singing 'It's a Small World After all?' You should be more like him!"  
  
Tatsumi was really, really nervous now. "What do you want me to do about it?"  
  
"That's your problem. My job is done now, so I'll be going."  
  
A vein popped out on Tatsumi's forehead. "But you didn't do anything but break a window! That cost a fortune, by the way! "  
  
"Uh..." The spirit sweatdropped and quickly disappeared.  
  
"This night is getting more and more disturbing. I don't know if I'll ever get back to sleep now."  
  
All of the sudden, the author appears behind Tatsumi with a large mallet. I don't think you'll have any trouble guessing what happens next.  
  
The clock rang once again at O' dark hundred hours. Tatsumi had somehow managed to acquire a major headache (I wonder why?) and wouldn't have even opened his eyes had not a really strange aroma filled the room. Tsuzuki would have flipped.  
  
"Huh, what?" He snorted and blinked. "What's going on?" he demanded.  
  
"I'm the Spirit of Christmas Present! I'm supposed to show you what your actions are currently doing to the other shinigami."  
  
Tatsumi looked up to see a huge pile of bones. "What? The Spirit of Present? But aren't you supposed to have a huge pile of food and drink and stuff? Where's all that? I mean-" He looked up to see that the spirit was none other but... Ruka. "Oh, I see. Never mind, then."  
  
The spirit looked around innocently. "Sorry, I got hungry."  
  
"Riiiiight."  
  
She took out a miniature television set. "Now, you see this? I set up hidden cameras all over Meifu."  
  
Tatsumi glanced over at the small television set. It clearly showed the areas of Meifu. The building was plain and barren. Tatsumi had forbidden any decorations except the wreaths that Tsuzuki had previously hung up.  
  
Random people were walking around, looking plain miserable. Watari had taken to lounging around on the couch (Tatsumi had stopped giving him grants for his lab) and Tsuzuki, driven by hunger, was busy scribbling pictures of food on paper, afterwards eating the paper. Hisoka, if any different, was just glad that Saya and Yuma weren't chasing him around anymore.  
  
Tatsumi was almost saddened by the sight of Tsuzuki. "He's desperate."  
  
"Your chief is getting rather upset. Maybe you should start buying food again."  
  
Deep in thought, Tatsumi shook his head. "No way. If I start spending money again, they'll just take advantage of it again. Tsuzuki eats enough as it is."  
  
Present sighed. "Well, if ya can't beat 'em, hope somebody else can. Future should be here in a bit, and I don't think you'll be happy to see him." She faded away, leaving Tatsumi alone once again.  
  
"What is going on here? No one has ever bothered me this much." He lay down. This was getting tiresome and annoying, not to mention that he was getting a really bad lack of sleep. Maybe if he broke the clock, they would all stop bothering him. Then again, what kind of clock strikes midnight three times in one night?  
  
The clock rang again. Cuckoo! Cuckoo! (What, did you think he had a grandfather clock?)  
  
Tatsumi rolled over and hoped that it wasn't the time he thought it was. He listened: twelve cuckoos. "Drat." Then he heard something. His name was being called all spooky-like.  
  
"Scrooge -- I mean - Tamahome - I mean - Damn!" The spirit threw down a piece of paper, which, upon further examination, was recognized as the script.  
  
"...Tamahome?"  
  
"Forget it. Anyway, now I'm supposed to show you your future. Are you ready for this?"  
  
(Side note: Only one who has read a volume of Fushigi Yugi would know who Tamahome is)  
  
"Wait a minute. You look kind of familiar."  
  
"You're getting off the subject! Let's get on with it." The set waved, and the happenings of different times flew past. It stopped on one particular set. It was raining and everyone was dressed in black, standing around a casket.  
  
"What does this have to do with anything? Who's inside the casket?" Tatsumi asked.  
  
The spirit looked at him. "You are inside the casket. This is your funeral."  
  
Dramatic music played as Tatsumi gasped. "What? No! I'm dead! Ah! I'm - wait... I'm already dead!"  
  
"Oh, shoot."  
  
The set goes back to Tatsumi's room as a book flies across the room and hits the spirit in the head.  
  
"Get out of my scene, Past!" The real Future appears as the spirit of past reluctantly faded away. "He does that every time."  
  
Tatsumi blinked. "I see... I think..." He looked up to see which of the shinigami this spirit looked suspiciously like. "Muraki?! What the heck?!" He jumped up and tried to run to the door, but got tangled in his bed sheets and fell down.  
  
"Relax, I have nothing to do with you. I just want to get this over with so I can get back to my Tsuzuki shrine. I will now show you the real future."  
  
The set got all wavy again, but this time it stopped at Meifu. Watari had blown himself up trying to make his own chemicals, Tsuzuki had eaten all of the wax fruit and was too hungry to eat any other inanimate objects, almost all of the employees had quit, and Hisoka, well... he still hadn't changed.  
  
Even Tatsumi was appalled at the scene. "Nobody's doing their job! No jobs mean no money! No money means - "  
  
"That's right, Tatsumi." 'Muraki' smiled and laughed slightly. "Enma- chou will go bankrupt, and with nobody to take care of the death rate, the world will succumb to chaos!"  
  
"Bankrupt? Noooooooooo!" Tatsumi fell down on the floor and started twitching.  
  
"If you don't straighten up, you will never see another penny in your afterlife!" This was followed by maniacal laughter.  
  
Tatsumi stood up. "Wait a minute. If you're getting such a kick out of this, why are you trying to warn me?"  
  
"No reason, no reason at all." He turned around to make sure all of the Tsuzuki pictures that the author had bribed him with were still there.  
  
He turned back to the subject. "I can't live without money! I'll change, I'll do anything! Just please, don't take my money!"  
  
Suddenly everything was gone. Tatsumi was in his own room, his own bed. There were no spirits, no odd time-traveling devices and, most importantly, his wallet was still full. "Was it all just a dream?" He looked at his clock. It was four o' clock AM, an hour before he usually got up to get ready for work. He quietly snuck out of bed and snuck to the kitchen. Then, he snuck to the counter. Then, he realized that he didn't have to sneak anymore because he lived alone.  
  
He went over to the trashcan and dug through it until he came upon Tsuzuki's invitation...  
  
** Christmas Day **  
  
It was the day of the big party, and Tsuzuki's house looked great. The only place that had not been used for space was the buffet table, which looked suspiciously lonely. There were decorations and there were little dancing Santa Clauses that Watari had brought to 'life' (unfortunately, he had also drawn them, so they looked more like deformed gnomes).  
  
"Your party is great, Tsuzuki!" Watari bounced up to his friend. "Everyone's having a wonderful time!"  
  
Tsuzuki looked up to his friend. "That's great! But... why isn't Tatsumi here? I planned this party so he could get a break! Why, Watari?"  
  
"You know how Tatsumi is. He wouldn't come even if he wanted to! He thinks parties are a waste of time and money." Watari tried to think of some way to cheer Tsuzuki up. "I know, let's open presents!"  
  
At the sound of presents, everyone dropped what they were doing and flocked around the tree. (Literally, flocked. Ever seen a flock of geese? That's what it was like.) When no one could decide who was going to be Santa Clauses, it was decided that one of Watari's deformed gnomes would. When the question came up of whether or not the gnome could lift the presents, or indeed, even read whom the present was for, Tsuzuki was elected.  
  
"These are great presents!" some random EnmaCho employee shouted out. Everyone was happy with his or her gift. Every gift fit the person that it was given to and there was lots of candy given out (bought, not homemade).  
  
However, Tsuzuki could not enjoy his present (which, again, was mainly food). He was still wondering why Tatsumi had not come when the door opened and a figure loomed in the doorway.  
  
"Hello, Tsuzuki-san."  
  
"Tatsumiii!" He latched on to the accountant, now in inu-mode. "You came, you came! Why didn't you come sooner?"  
  
"I would have, but I was... delayed. Anyway, I have your present right here."  
  
"A present? For me? Where?" Tsuzuki began searching for his present.  
  
Tatsumi held Tsuzuki away with one hand while he fished the present out with his other. "It's right here. Tsuzuki, this is the most expensive present I have ever bought anybody."  
  
Tsuzuki took the present and shredded the paper that was around it. What was underneath, was...a candy bar! (Hey, Tatsumi is Tatsumi, even if he has lightened up a bit.) Tsuzuki was happy over it either way.  
  
So the party went on through the night, and the sky got dark. Everyone went outside in the cool air and relaxed. By carefully arranging paper tubes soaked with the chemicals he got for his present and lighting them on fire, Watari managed to create a fireworks display in the shape of a Christmas tree.  
  
And Tsuzuki cried out, with happy delight, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Um... right.... This is the first 'full-length' fic I've ever written, so give me some feedback! Review! 


End file.
